The Best Part Of The Party Is Waiting For You

The first step, the first tooth, the first speech. Then comes the doll, bicycle, the first day of school, the first writing, then reading, and so on we keep waiting. We make the journey of life a constant dream and hope, and so we live stuck in the past or anxious about the future, and never present and focused on the reality of now.

It’s like that phrase: the best thing about the party is waiting for her

I believe that Carlos Drummond had this feeling when he wrote “What now José?”, everything he had hoped for had passed, the party was over, the people left, what was left? And then you go to a new project. There is nothing wrong with that, having dreams, plans, projects is what moves us in this journey of life, the big problem is when we live only by dreams, when we are so focused on the top of the mountain that we lose all the way to get there.

We didn’t feel the wind hit our face, we didn’t hear the birds singing, we didn’t look at the flower that was in the middle of that rock, among the stones. We missed it all because we’re so eagerly waiting for the top of the mountain, to get to the top to see what’s there, that we don’t see the beautiful hike that takes place along the way.

It reminds me of when I was a child and I waited all year for Christmas, and how long it took, it felt like years instead of months. Christmas came and I loved to spend the night waiting for Santa Claus, after everything happened there was a little depression, typical of the end of the party, and the thought came: “it went so fast”.

And so were the years of waiting for parties, classes, friends, loves, dreams, until the day I managed to be approved and get my driver’s license. It was such a great happiness, after so many classes, so much sweating on my hands, so many wobbly legs, and the day came to seek the dedication I spent in the last few months and with it in my hands, depression came and I thought: and now? What am I going to do with her? I didn’t have a car, I needed to borrow it from my mom, I didn’t have places to go because I was always with my boyfriend who had his own car, anyway, I realized that I looked forward to that moment so much that I haven’t experienced anything in the last few months except the realization of that ideal.

I’m not against dreams, projects, ideals, on the contrary, I believe a lot in the possibility of dreamers, I also believe that the world is the world and all things that exist passed through the hands of some dreamer who was called crazy.

What I don’t believe is fixation, that part that suffocates with wanting so much, that forgets everything about the now in the name of the long-awaited future, that part we call ego and wants you to live according to a pattern, which brings anxiety and it contaminates its essence, it is in this part of the story that we lost ourselves. We allow ourselves to be fooled by the false illusion of reality, when in fact the future is like touching the horizon, you will always need to go one step further.

And how to focus on now? It’s always simple but never easy

Focusing on the now is feeling what you are doing, what you smell, what you see, where you are putting your feet. Forget the photos and selfies for a moment, record in your memory what only they can perpetuate, feed on the good thoughts of the moments, there is always something beautiful happening.

Use the contemplation of moments as a key to the door of now. Meditate, put your attention in the now. When getting into the car, pay attention to the route. How many times did you go home from work, or vice versa, on automatic? Has it ever happened to you to turn off the key and think: How did I get here? All of this is your lack of focus on the present, leaving your attention focused on what has already happened and can’t happen again, or thinking about that promotion that might never come.

Life is like a traveling train, the season arrives, new people, new moments, new learnings, the season passes, and so on. The important thing is to think about how you would like to get to the final station. What do you believe will really take away from all of this.

The moments you spent without living, or all those intense experiences you really felt, each party, each look, smile, speech, each moment you gave yourself to let your soul vibrate in the presence of the present. Take every minute to live what life offers you now, a good cliché to wake up your mind that is deluded by the ego, that ego that does not allow you to see that life is present!