Emperor Syndrome, Tyrant Children

We are increasingly surprised by the behaviors children have towards their parents: lack of respect, insults, raising their voices, among many other things. A type of authority that goes from being in the parents to being in the children.

Looks like the roles are reversed. It is no longer the parents who set the rules and impose punishments, but the children who have all the authority.

What happened? Why this change? Since it was established that any “slap on the butt” or “ear-pulling” is considered abuse, parents have become frightened and children have seen an effective way to manipulate their parents.

This submission is of no benefit to our children, who grow up hostile to their own family and with an authoritarian belief that sooner or later will send them the bill.

In the mind of an authoritarian child

A child with “Emperor Syndrome” will always choose what to eat, what others should do, when to go out, where the family will go on vacation, what to watch on television… In short, she orders, dictates and orders so much in it as in others.

Why does this happen? Because these kids have underdeveloped empathy. This means that they are not able to experience the emotions and feelings that have to do with putting themselves in someone else’s shoes.

If we don’t do what the authoritarian child says and orders, we will have to put up with their tantrums, tantrums and, in some cases, their aggressions. Thus, she becomes a more than authoritarian child, a dictator. It is very easy to distinguish a child who has the terrible “Emperor Syndrome”:

• They have self-centered personality traits.
• They have little tolerance for frustration.
• They don’t know how to control themselves or manage their feelings and emotions.
• They do not tolerate their requirements not being met.
• They know the weaknesses of others.
• They are experts at psychologically manipulating others.

When we recognize all this, we sometimes wonder why we are not doing anything to resolve it. Especially when we’re watching from the outside. There are many television programs that show this terrible behavior. Why don’t parents take action? Because they’re afraid, but mostly because they’ve allowed their own children to get to this point.

The importance of educating

For reasons that we don’t know, there are parents who exercise a passive and very relaxed upbringing that encourages children to become authoritarian sooner or later. This not only causes problems at home, but also at school. How can teachers deal with these authoritarian personalities?

These children do not know what respect, forgiveness is… they are completely unaware of their place. Therefore, they become challenging people without a goal in their life other than having everyone else at their mercy. Parents chose to educate their children passively, without measuring the consequences that sooner or later will begin to regret

We know that educating is an arduous, complicated task that requires a lot of effort and energy that sometimes we don’t have or don’t want to have. However, when we decide to have children this is one of the first premises we accept. We take on the responsibility of educating them, something that inevitably takes effort.

When we are still children, we believe that there is time to resolve this attitude that sometimes goes beyond this. The problem is when adolescence comes and we find ourselves terrified in a hurricane of contradictory attitudes that can end in aggression. This step towards maturity finds itself immersed in what they consider to be “correct”. However, they waste their time believing that they are enjoying life while they are wasting it.

That’s why it ‘s so important that as parents we strive so that our children also learn the value of effort and know that it’s important to be responsible and respectful of others.

Limits are required. We are forming people who will live in this world and of whom we should be proud. If anything, we cannot expect a change.

Authoritarian children will take a lot of tumbles to learn, but they will never understand why no one raised them right from the start.

Images courtesy of Nicoletta Ceccoli, Iván Alfaro