Anger, A Thorn In The Heart

Anger, A Thorn In The Heart

Feeling resentful involves a constant, significant feeling of anger that doesn’t dissipate. We’ve all experienced this at some point in our lives. This feeling can often turn into a desire for revenge and become obsessive. In this case, we need to stop, reflect and, if necessary, seek professional help.

In some cases, the reason for this conflict may be somewhat irrelevant; for many others, however, a small affront represents a large-scale aggression. In both cases, the trigger that triggers the feeling is the same. Memories trigger the same emotions we feel at the time of negative events. Every time an external trigger reminds us of these events, we suffer a lot.

If the person who feels resentment has been the object of a great aggression, he may suffer much more than the aggressor himself, because while the former holds a deep hurt, the latter can feel calm and free from all guilt.

In the face of resentment and resentment, a cool head and good will

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One of the biggest difficulties of rancor has to do with the lack of expressiveness. Often the person who hurt us didn’t realize that he’s harmed us, and yet we add to the hurt with an obviously useless rancor.

To end resentment it is necessary to know how to forgive and dialogue. A forgiveness that is the product of understanding and understanding the defects or deficiencies of the other. Forgiveness without consenting to further aggression. When you forgive a grudge, you are letting go and making room for positive emotions.

Stopping thinking about what happened and moving on helps us to heal our hearts. This cure results from reason, good heart and wisdom that we accumulate throughout life.

Everything must be analyzed in detail: why this happened, to what extent I am responsible or not for this problem, what is the other person’s responsibility in this situation. See if there is any solution, even if it is partial, to improve the situation a little and make the appropriate decisions in a sensible, objective and impartial way. It’s not easy, but it’s worth it.

When we feel resentment, it is important to vent, according to our personality and the size of the aggression. We should not just remain silent, as this can lead to depression or aggression.

Don’t make hot-headed decisions

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When facts are recent and we are still very affected by the situation, it is difficult to be objective, sensible and fair. It’s like putting out a fire with gasoline. In that case, it ‘s best to calm down before making any decisions. Life goes on; “tomorrow the sun will rise again” and more problems will appear. Life is a constant “fall and rise”.

Don’t get stuck in the past and don’t be questioning the reasons for the facts. What’s gone is gone and we have to move on. Taking the position of victim doesn’t help solve the problem, redo what you can or start over from scratch.

The desire to let go of that resentment will be critical. Depending on how we resolve this situation, we can grow as people, stagnate and even fall back. Learning or not is a personal decision; it is far better to learn of your own free will than to be forced by circumstances.

Don’t run away from situations, but understand and assume

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It is important to learn from experiences. If we act correctly, an offense received, instead of representing a disgrace, will, in time, become a solid basis for facing life: the effort to overcome resentment is a great investment in ourselves.

However, if after a few attempts the person still insists on hurting you, it is best to walk away. We may not be the right person to show you that this way of acting will get you nowhere.

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It’s no use arguing with people, because that only increases the suffering. Where there is a lot of hatred and resentment, the environment can become problematic and even dangerous ; it can trigger an escalation of aggression with unpredictable negative consequences.

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