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We often wonder what the purpose of being alive and full of energy is. The answer may be quite simple: learn to enjoy unconditional love. Of course, unconditional love is the purest and most incredible gift the universe gives us ; it can be worked on and developed over a lifetime. In fact, when we are children we unconditionally love our parents and closest family members, but as we mature we end up forgetting about it.
We are more interested in improving unconditional love, biologically speaking, with a romantic partner. When we are in a loving relationship, that love develops in all areas and knows no boundaries. It is not enough just a happy heart and full of desire to become a better person, it is necessary to unconditionally deliver part of our essence to our partner.
American psychiatrist Mark Goulston raised the question: What does it take to develop unconditional love in a relationship? He answered it himself in 03 steps, which we share with you today.
Develop common activities
According to Goulston, love is built on a series of habits that we unconsciously develop. When we love our partner unconditionally, we love being with him and enjoying time together, sharing pleasurable or relaxing activities.
The passage of time or some circumstances can end the passion, and with this, the love that was very intense in the beginning. At the same time, we begin to discover new flaws in our partner and the ones we already knew seem unbearable.
These new discoveries don’t happen because we’re closer to our partner; the remoteness and routine feed this despair little by little. Exploring new activities together can regain closeness and complicity.
Walk together with mutual trust
If I asked you: what does the union of a couple demonstrate? It’s the behavior and body language between them. We live and build true love, feeling that we are by his side (a), showing our affection and supporting him in all situations.
Walking hand in hand is a simple but very special gesture ; it means permanence, contact and union. It is the physical representation of walking together, venturing out without losing reference points.
Discussing and exchanging views about what we don’t agree with is normal. Otherwise, we would be facing dependence and lack of respect. In this moment of disagreement, avoid anger; letting go of bitterness and negative attitudes will help keep your relationship healthy and full.
Focus on your partner’s good side and express your emotions
One of the things that sets “happy partners” apart is that they recognize that together they are stronger, they recognize that their partner makes their life better, that they have many qualities that are hard to find and that somehow they are an excellent complement to the your personality. Furthermore, this thought is not something we should hide, but something we should share with our partner.
According to Goulston, happy couples focus on the positive. Love seems to distort our attention, so that we pay more attention to behaviors that please us than to those that annoy us in our partner.
Also, there is a tendency to resist positive or catastrophic thoughts in times of crisis. Somehow love gives more importance to what is positive and strengthens the relationship. In this way, negative moments are quickly overcome.
When we love, it’s easier to overlook the small arguments of everyday life. If our partner has a goal, we fight with it and when he comes to us, we are here to support him.
