Fresh Start And New Smile

Hello.

I am writing to say that I will leave you. I assume you already know I met someone. It is me. I’ll give myself an opportunity. I deserve it.

I stayed by your side longer than I could and you must recognize that. His mouth was full of promises that turned out to be empty.  I waited for many years for these hugs and those caresses that never came.

Why did you treat me like this? You and I had a wonderful, prosperous future ahead of us. Can you tell me what you were so afraid of? It is me. Your desire, your illusion, your will to live.

The dawns, the travels and the opportunities eluded us. Our time together is over and… And nothing. There is only emptiness. So I decided that I will go on my own, be responsible and fulfill my life. I’m here for something and not to let life go by.

You taught me that, remember? There was a time when rainy afternoons made you think of me, smile and make a thousand plans. On Mondays when you got up to study or to go to work, you would say to me: “With you until the end of the world”. And I, silly, believed.

If I have to choose a moment at your side, I already have it very clear: summer. On his face there was WILL!!  In the first week of the summer you burned with passion, you didn’t leave me alone for a minute and we lived an intense romance together.

But then… later you made me cry. I forgot again and let life pass again. Day after day.

The beginning of a new year was also wonderful for me. You filled  every corner of our house with new life projects for two. Living in paradise also had its days numbered, but… deep in my heart I always thought that you would come back burning with desire and tear my clothes off with your teeth.

Why a new smile now?

Because I’ve lived long chained to the  “prison of tomorrow” . Something about the misery of our life together “snapped” in my head and pressed the right button.

You and I have been through a lot together. I just asked you for your time to share the desire in me and the desire to do great things. But time passes and we don’t formalize our relationship.

Wants to know? I’m not just another toy you can collect. Life is to be lived, to overcome our obstacles and to share goals with dreams. You are not in this world to whine and let go of all the trains that pass before you.

Your strength, your dreams and I have always been together, by your side.  We never let you down, but we are incompatible. We live on action and you on words.

We screamed every day, every month and every year: we’re here, come get us when you wake up! And you were always tired or didn’t feel like it. Then, the illusion that kept me by his side began to disappear…

I didn’t surrender, but I think I was wrong to trust you to take me by your side forever. I fell, suffered and cried. Everything to be by your side.

But my patience is gone. From today I start to live.  Smiling like there’s no tomorrow. I do not want you to be sad; it’s best for both of you.

This situation just made me feel small and that means it’s time to GROW. Promise me you will fly… I  give you the best of reasons for you to move your wings in the air.  That reason is  YOU !!!!

Signed: Your illusion for life.

Main image courtesy of Natiles