Why Is Physical Punishment On Children A Mistake?

If we followed the phrase of the wise George Washington Carver, who said that “education is the key that unlocks the golden door of freedom” , we could reach the conclusion that physical punishment, which is usually added to the deprivation of freedom itself, are a huge mistake.

Still, physical punishment goes far beyond its disastrous consequences for child development. Even though disobedience is sometimes difficult to fight, hitting will never be the best solution. Perhaps at some point it will be an effective and convenient measure for parents, as it requires little or no reflection, but there will always be a better alternative for educating the little one. Harder, less automatic, but better for him in the long run.

What are physical punishments?

Unfortunately, there are still parents who consider spanking to be positive when educating their children. However, each one leaves a mark that condemns more than it teaches, that brings fear more than the desire to behave well.

Therefore, educating children on spanking is more of a hindrance to their development than a help for them. In addition, when we talk about spankings, we also talk about pushing, shaking, pinching or the famous pat, which can even interrupt a misconduct, but they are far from explaining why this is not correct, let alone the need for imposed punishment.

As is logical, the consequences of the use of physical violence in education provoke a series of undesirable reactions in the child. We must know that our children tend to imitate what they see. Therefore, if in your day to day hitting is something common, they will understand that it is not bad when used for a certain purpose, and so they will act.

In fact, if we love children and they feel that love, and yet we hit them when they misbehave or don’t understand something, they will accept that corporal punishment is a part of love. In this way, they will develop understanding that intimidation and violence can also be an approved expression of love (by adults, who know everything to them) and, therefore, are acceptable.

Consequences of physical punishment on children

As we have already seen, corporal punishment is of little use beyond stopping a certain behavior in a moment without the need for reflection. In general, the consequences are always negative, especially in the long run. And if we add screams, punishments and a heavy environment to this form of creation, emotional problems will tend to multiply. That’s why it’s important to know this list of consequences and keep it very present:

• Hitting the child inhibits their autonomy, restricts their initiative and limits their ability to solve problems and their self-esteem. It blocks their self-esteem and raises negative expectations about themselves.
• It also limits the development of your intelligence and dramatically interferes with learning processes.
• It limits and even makes the family bond with the child weaken. In fact, this will affect you socially and emotionally, harming your way of relating to your surroundings.
• It awakens the feeling of abandonment, sadness and loneliness. The little one will feel useless and will lose, little by little, his self-esteem.
• Your view of the world will gradually become obscure, negative, threatening. It will be a place where he doesn’t count and so doesn’t care about anyone.
• It awakens feelings of anger, resentment, the need to escape without a destination. Furthermore, it will show you that the best way to face your emotions, the world and others is through violence.

How to educate children without hitting them

We know that it is sometimes quite difficult to discipline a child. This is normal, as they have their own personality, needs to explore and express themselves, and these do not always coincide with what we consider right. Even so, violence will never be the way.

It is vital that children’s education begin the day they are born. Of course, at this age we cannot argue with them, but they will have to absorb the rules and regulations of their home from the beginning. There are many formulas that will help prevent physical abuse and will help your child to develop in a healthy environment. For example, positive reinforcement. Appreciate the child’s correct behavior rather than punishing negative ones. By teaching correct behaviors we also show those that are not. This is the great power of positive reinforcement.

Of course as parents we should try to stay calm. Most spanking children receive are more the product of an impulse than a corrective measure that has been thought about in advance. In fact, many parents don’t want to hit their children, but in doing so they need to justify themselves. Based on this “after” justification (necessary for them to feel good parents) many support the use of violence.

This article does not bring an easy subject, as it calls into question many of the traditional methods with which many of our ancestors were educated, and even many of us. However, just as human beings advance in many areas, they also do so in early childhood education. This is because we speak of an integrated custom that teaches little, legitimizing violence and instilling fear (and not respect).